A DAY IN "THE LIFE OF RILEY"

When my friend Kevin-Anthony asked if I would write the script for his 3rd annual "Black 2: Broadway" Tony Awards viewing party (held at B.B. King's Lucille Room), I immediately jumped on it because - like the previous years - I knew that I would be a part of history as the words about the honorees would be mine... and what a way to have my words show up but through the inspiration of people like Tony-award-winning choreographer George Faison. The words seem to move the audience, so I will share here.

On this past Sunday, Anthony and I had to do a costume change from our New Rochelle appointment to our more formal evening appointment in Times Square, but we know how to shift quickly.

DIVA OF ALL DIVAS Jenifer Lewis hosted alongside popular MTV personality Sway Calloway.

My words introduced her as follows:

OUR DIVA CO-HOST TONIGHT HAS BROUGHT US SO MUCH JOY VIA THE SPECTRUM OF FILM, TELEVISION, AND STAGE, HER ACTUAL “RESUME” WOULD HAVE US HERE ALL NIGHT… IF WE WERE TO READ IT.

BUT TO TOUCH ON SOME KEY POINTS:

• SHE IS A ST. LOUIS, MISSOURI NATIVE.
• YOUNGEST OF SEVEN CHILDREN
• AFTER GRADUATING FROM WEBSTER COLLEGE, SHE PACKED HER BAGS FOR "THE BIG APPLE" (NEW YORK CITY… ) AND HAS BEEN BITING EVER SINCE!

GETTING HER START IN CONSECUTIVE HIT BROADWAY MUSICALS INCLUDING “EUBIE”, “COMIN’ UPTOWN”, AND “DREAMGIRLS”, SHE SET HER CAREER IN MOTION.

BUT THEN, SHE TOOK HER ACT ON THE ROAD – TOURING WITH “THE DIVINE MISS BETTE MIDLER” AS AN INFAMOUS “HARLOTTE”.

NO SHOCK: HOLLYWOOD THEN CAME A CALLING AND HAVE YET TO LET HER GO. FROM PLAYING TINA TURNER’S MOTHER IN “WHAT’S LOVE GOT TO DO WITH IT” TO WHITNEY’S MAMA IN “THE PREACHER’S WIFE”, WE HAVE SEEN HER STEAL SCENES --- FILM AFTER FILM: ABOUT 45 OF THEM TO BE EXACT.

AND HER BEAUTY AND TALENT HAVE GRACED A NEAR ONE-HUNDRED TV DRAMAS AND SITCOMS – INCLUDING AN AWESOMELY GENIUS, RECURRING TURN AS “TONI’S MOM” IN “GIRLFRIENDS”.

BUT WE’D BE REMISS IF WE DIDN’T REFERENCE HER TOUR DE FORCE IN A CABLE MOVIE THAT HAS BECOME BELOVED BY THE BROADWAY BABIES AND “THE KIDS” AROUND THE WAY. IT’S “JACKIE’S BACK” IN WHICH SHE PORTRAYED “JACKIE WASHINGTON” THAT WILL ALWAYS PLACE A SMILE ON OUR FACES.

TRUTH BE TOLD, ALL SHE NEED BE IS HERSELF… AND THAT’S WHO WE’VE GOT TONIGHT. LADIES & GENTLEMEN, MISS JENNIFER LEWIS!!!!!

And I shouted Sway out like this:

AND YET, WITH GRACE, EDGE, AND INTELLECT… HE REPRESENTS… AND WELL!

FROM THE RED CARPETS OF MTV’S VARIOUS AWARDS SHOWS TO AWARD-WINNING SPECIALS THAT DECONSTRUCT THE GOOD, BAD, AND UGLY OF HIP-HOP, SWAY IS ON THE PULSE OF WHAT’S GOING ON IN ENTERTAINMENT AND – IN PARTICULAR – WHAT’S HAPPENING WITH OUR YOUNG FOLKS.

AND TO HAVE HIM EXTENDING HIS TALENTS TO “BROADWAY” TONIGHT PLEASES US IMMENSELY.

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, PLEASE GIVE A BIG BROADWAY OVATION TO:

SWAY!!!!

Kevin-Anthony, who founded BLACK 2: BROADWAY with Sean Hollingsworth, performed a beautiful "If You Believe" (from "The Wiz") for the masses ( www.b2productions.xbuild.com/ ) as artist Jeremiah (http://www.jeremiahonline.com/) performed "What Would I Do If I Could Feel" (the Tin Man's song from "The Wiz"). Miss Lewis got a little help from a friend, Tony-award winning Adrienne Lenox (who co-starred opposite Diana Ross in "Double Platinum") on a brilliantly campy and touching rendition of "Home". This, because the evening saluted the legendary Broadway production of 'The Wiz'. This is how I shouted that moment out in words:

WELL, IF YOU’RE OVER A CERTAIN AGE… AND IT DOESN’T HAVE TO BE SO OLD. IT COULD BE 35…. MAYBE 30 YEARS OLD…. YOU KNOW THAT BEFORE THERE WAS A MOVIE CALLED “THE WIZ”, THERE WAS A BROADWAY MUSICAL THAT TURNED “BROADWAY” OUT.

ONCE THIS ADAPTATION OF L. FRANK BAUM’S “THE WONDERFUL WIZARD OF OZ” CAME TO LIFE, BROADWAY WOULD NEVER BE THE SAME.

IT FEATURED EXCLUSIVELY: AFRICAN AMERICAN ACTORS. PERHAPS NOTHING NEW.

BUT “THE WIZ” WAS A BREAKTHROUGH UNDER THE AMBITIOUS AND NO-HOLDS-BARRED VISION OF ITS DIRECTOR, THE GREAT GEOFFREY HOLDER. WE’RE TALKING LARGE-SCALE AND BIG-BUDGET, WHICH LAID THE FOUNDATION FOR AFRICAN AMERICAN HITS TO COME, LIKE “SOPHISTICATED LADIES” AND “DREAMGIRLS”.

“THE WIZ” OPENED IN JANUARY 1975 AT THE MAJESTIC THEATER TO RAVE REVIEWS. IT LATER MOVED TO THE BROADWAY THEATRE. IT RAN FOR FOUR YEARS AND OVER 16-HUNDRED PERFORMANCES.

“THE WIZ” WON SEVEN TONY AWARDS, INCLUDING BEST MUSICAL.

AND SOME OF THOSE SPECIAL PEOPLE WHO WERE “EASING ON DOWN THE ROAD” INCLUDE: STEPHANIE MILLS AT THE HELM AS DOROTHY…. HINTON BATTLE AS THE SCARECROW…. AND TIGER HAYNES AS THE TIN MAN…

HERE TONIGHT… 32 YEARS LATER… WE CELEBRATE --- FOR ALL OF THE JOY ITS BROUGHT SO MANY GIRLS AND BOYS; MEN AND WOMEN; GAY AND STRAIGHT ---- “THE WIZ”.

AND TONIGHT, TO ACCEPT:

“THE WIZ” HIMSELF… ANDRE DESHIELDS!!!

“ABERLENE”…. CLARICE TAYLOR!!!!

“THE TINMAN”…. HOWARD PORTER

ONE OF THE “TORNADO DANCERS”…. ARLENE ROLANDT.

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, THE CAST OF “THE WIZ”!!!!!!

Andre Deshields reprised "If You Believe" as he and members of the original cast basked in their ovations, including Ben Harney Jr. who was one of the original Scarecrows (and who originated the role of "Curtis" in "Dreamgirls"). Last year, Harney got the chance to be honored with some of his original cast-mates of "Dreamgirls" including Jennifer Holliday. Holliday also hosted that 2006 affair that had so many of us waiting with baited breath to see what "The Color Purple" would do. (Meanwhile, we enjoyed Miss Holliday's stirring rendition of "And I Am Telling You I'm Not Going" one more glorious time). In the end, it only took home one trophy and my friend LaChanze received it. I got to celebrate with her afterwards last year.

Back to this year, George Faison was honored twice. As a part of this group, he was celebrated. But he also received the Legend Award. My script honors him as follows:

HE’S THE FIRST BLACK TO WIN THE TONY AWARD IN THE CATEGORY OF CHOREOGRAPHY.

THE YEAR WAS 1975.

THE SHOW? “THE WIZ”.

THAT DISTINCTION ALONE MAKES HIM “LEGENDARY” AND AN “ICON”, BUT HE CONTINUES TO DELIVER ON ONE OF THE MOST SPARKLING CAREERS ANYONE HAS EVER SEEN.

THIS LANDMARK MOMENT PUNCTUATED AN ALREADY-SUCCESSFUL DANCING CAREER IN HIT SHOWS LIKE “PURLIE” AND “SINNER MAN”.

AS CHOREOGRAPHER, HE CONTINUED TO OUT-DO HIMSELF WITH BROADWAY WORKS LIKE 1983’S “PORGY AND BESS” FOR WHICH HE WAS ALSO NOMINATED…

BUT HE TOO WAS RESPONSIBLE FOR THE CHOREOGRAPHY THAT MANY OF OUR R&B GREATS TOOK ON THE ROAD – INCLUDING MOST NOTABLY THE BIG PRODUCTIONS OF “EARTH, WIND, AND FIRE”.

THEN, THERE WAS THE EMMY NOD FOR HIS BRILLIANT WORK WITH LYNN WHITFIELD IN “THE JOSEPHINE BAKER STORY”.

ON AND ON, WE COULD GO WITH EXAMPLES OF HIS GREATNESS…. AND ON AND ON, HE GOES TO DELIVER EVIDENCE OF IT.

HE’S CURRENTLY GOT “IF THIS HAT COULD TALK” ON THE ROAD. IT’S A ROUSING MUSICAL TRIBUTE TO CIVIL RIGHTS ICON DOROTHY HEIGHT. AND IT’S RECEIVING RAVES ALL OVER THE NATION. AND IF THAT WEREN’T ENOUGH, HE WAS FEATURED ON BET’S REALITY SHOW, “ONE NIGHT ONLY” – ABOUT THE NEW ORLEANS HIGH-SCHOOLERS WHO STAGED “DREAMGIRLS” JUST AFTER HURRICANE KATRINA HIT.

ALSO, HE’S CURRENTLY WORKSHOPPING --- AS WRITER AND DIRECTOR --- E. LYNN HARRIS’ “INVISIBLE LIFE”, WHICH HAS BEEN ADAPTED INTO A STAGE MUSICAL FEATURING ORIGINAL MUSIC FROM ASHFORD & SIMPSON.

HE NEVER STOPS… AND KEEPS POSING THE QUESTION: “WHAT ARE YOU DOING?”… SIMPLY BECAUSE HE KNOW WHAT HE’S DOING.

THAT’S WHY OUR “BLACK 2: BROADWAY” LIVING LEGEND IS NONE OTHER THAN: GEORGE FAISON!!!

And Freddie Jackson came to the stage to perform a flawless "You Are My Lady" for Broadway icon Irene Gandy, who I honored as follows:

OUR VANGUARD AWARD RECIPIENT TOO IS AN ICON IN THE BUSINESS OF “BROADWAY”.

JUST THIS YEAR ALONE, SHE IS ATTACHED TO 11 TONY NOMINATIONS FOR “SPRING AWAKENING” AND FOUR NOMINATIONS FOR “RADIO GOLF”.

THIS, BECAUSE SHE STUMBLED INTO A CAREER IN THEATER 40-OR-SO YEARS AGO???

SOUNDS LIKE A BROADWAY MUSICAL, BUT IT’S NOT. IT’S HER LIFE.

WHILE RAISING A DAUGHTER, THE LONG-ISLAND NATIVE DID A QUICK STINT IN THE MID-SIXTIES… AS AN ACTRESS.

THE NEGRO ENSEMBLE COMPANY WAS ONE OF THE OUTLETS FOR WHICH SHE PERFORMED. AND SHE WOULD SOON THEREAFTER GET THE OPPORTUNITY TO BECOME A “PUBLICIST” OR “PRESS AGENT” FOR THIS HISTORIC COMPANY THAT HAS GIVEN BIRTH TO SO MANY OF OUR BLACK ACTORS.
AND WITH HER ENGAGING, FLAMBOYANT WAY…SHE BEGAN TO GET LOTS AND LOTS OF PRESS FOR THE N-E-C, THE FIRST AFRICAN AMERICAN TO DO SO… FOR BROADWAY AND OFF-BROADWAY!!!

AND SINCE THEN, SHE’S DONE MORE THAN 100 BRAODWAY SHOWS – FROM “BUBBLING BROWN SUGAR” TO “THE WIZ” TO LENA HORNE’S “THE LADY AND HER MUSIC”.

SHE TOO WORKED WITH THE POPULAR SOUL/ROCK GROUP “LABELLE” – AS AN INDEPENDENT PRESS AGENT ON THE TRIO’S LEGENDARY 1975 METROPOLITAN OPERA PERFORMANCE – THE FIRST ROCK CONCERT AT THE FAMED MUSIC HALL.

THAT MOMENT LED TO MORE PUBLICITY WORK AT CBS RECORDS AND AN AWESOME CAREER THAT HAS MADE SURE OUR SHOWS (AND ALL SHOWS) ARE SEEN… AND REVIEWED!

SHE TRULY HAS BEEN AND CONTINUES TO BE AT THE FOREFRONT OF ALL THINGS “BLACK”, “BROADWAY”, AND BEYOND, WHICH IS WHY SHE’S OUR 2007 RECIPIENT OF THE “BLACK 2: BROADWAY” VANGUARD AWARD.

My friend Marcia Pendelton was in the house and helped do much of the marketing for this event. She's always the difference to me as it relates to getting my culture on - so it was wonderful to share this night with her. (www.walktallgirlproductions.com/). So many other friends and familiar faces - from "AOL Black Voices" entertainment guru Karu Daniels to MTV radio's Bridget Bland to my Morehouse brother Khalid. Also, Anthony and I got to chat with Kym Whitley who was in town for a comedy show. (www.kymwhitley.net/)

By the way, Jennifer Lewis is currently doing a new one-woman show "Bipolar, Bath, & Beyond".

Oh! And of course, we watched "The Tony's" during these pressentations and performances. Everyone was blown away by Miss Fantasia: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a0-NlqvB3sY

This year's event was co-sponsored by Baccarat Fine Crystal and had promotional support from Paramount Pictures and American Airlines.

Proceeds of the ticket sales are being donated to the Black Aids Institute. 

When I was a teen, the whole high school journey seemed to be about having a date for the prom. In the south, there's little or no concern about anything but the hetero-sexual values and making sure those show up. And I took on that responsibility, even though I felt deep down inside I was gay. That  feeling wouldn't get a voice for another ten years.

But fast forward 20 years and I'll show you a ME who is going to the prom with my man, Anthony. WE'VE COME ALONG WAY, BABY... and THANKS to BLEU Magazine publisher Devon Christopher, who came up with the concept of "Bleu Prom ’07 – The Second Time Around". Devon and friend Richard Pelzer, who consults with BLEU, invited Anthony and me to participate as they suspected that neither of us got the chance to do our PROMs the first time exactly like we would have wanted. So, we accepted the invitation and were pleasantly surprised at what was there to meet us at at Strata NYC (21st Street and Broadway). (www.stratanyc.com)

First... a BLEU carpet that allowed us to pose in our ensembles that Anthony picked out for us to wear.

I ran into many friends, including Jaime Earl (www.jaimeearl.com), who worked on the art direction for the night. Jaime Earl LLC is a solid competitor in the field of organic skin care products. She has been in business since 2003, and during that time has developed a full line of 100% natural, premium "Green" skincare products for face & body, professional use and for use at home. Her products are "Green", meaning 100% chemical and paraben free, yet having a shelf life of one year. The company started out of a mother's need for high quality treatments that didn't irritate her daughter's severe eczema. She also wanted something that actually made an impact, a difference, and out of her desire for a line of sophisticated products that were luxurious, effective, and completely clean. I met Jaime many years ago in Atlanta through my good girlfriend Camille... and she is now thriving with her products. Good to see her...

But back to the prom, America's Next Top Model candidate Jade (who I hung out with a year from this night at "The Color Purple" after party) was not in attendance, but donated $1,500 towards the OPEN BAR. GENEREOUS! Another finalist Nik showed up to crown "THE KING" and "THE KING".

The night was co-sponsored by Gay Men of African Descent (GMAD) & LifeBeat and was set up to raise awareness and bring about a greater sense of community among gay men of color.

The event was hosted by arts, culture and entertainment expert Nathan Hale Williams and included a special performance by several artists from Columbia's Music with a Twist roster. recording “This event is a dream come to reality,” says Devon Christopher, Publisher of Bleu
Magazine. “I am overly excited at the opportunity that we will all get a chance to do it all over again, but this time…our way”. AND WE DID! CONGRATS, DEVON and all of BLEU!

When Diana Ross wrote her spiritual, positive, and arguably guarded memoir "Secrets of a Sparrow" in 1993, she pulled the title from a Gospel song "His Eye Is On The Sparrow". Now, Robin Givens has come out with her autobiographical tome "Grace Will Lead Me Home", culled from a verse of "Amazing Grace". Though her book tells an  emotional and highly personal story of her life and the struggles with her then-husband Mike Tyson, it's title read like "pun" to me as I thought about my "Amazing Grace" Nichole and how she is so much like "family" and "home" to me, it's a joy and honor that she and I have the opportunity to connect as much as we do. I just shared with Anthony how Nichole is the first person to enroll me in actually enjoying my Thanksgiving holiday away from my family. Often, here in New York City, I would get blue when I wasn't with my family, but because things sometimes weren't the same (after mom's passing), I wouldn't really want to be with my family for Thanksgiving (as different members were different places and it just didn't feel like home to me). I would make a decision to stay up North and be depressed before I'd go home and feel "emotionally scattered". Enter Nichole, who - like many others - invited me to she and her husband Tony's home (as far back as 2001, I believe). My concerns were initially "She's from Seattle. Do they know how to cook soul food?". I knew if the food wasn't good, that would be enough to throw me over the edge. But can I tell you (as chronicled this past November in "A Day In The Life of Riley"), Nichole, her sister Tory, and the rest of the family can throw down in the kitchen and the joy that comes with our times together has made this a strong, annual tradition that I will always cherish. Truly, 'Grace will lead me home' and to many other brilliant, open, and generous people who come into my life through Nichole.

This past week sparked lots of evidence around that as our dear friends DeDe McGuire and her sister Resa (both of whom I've talked about on the BLOG) joined us. Both radio broadcasters (and - in the case - of Resa, a TV anchor out of Atlantic City), they wanted some time to chill with Nichole and me. Ern, a friend Kevin, and Anthony were in the mix too. And we had a blast. We went to Cafeteria for some food (www.cafeteriagroup.com) before hitting our karaoke spot (www.karaoke17.com/). We sang all night long and just enjoyed each other's company.

On Sunday, Nichole and her "Desperate Housewives" (as I jokingly call them) gathered at her friend Monica's house (in New Rochelle). Monica, her husband Brian, and their son Miles were awesome hosts as we enjoyed lovingly-prepared fare from the grill. As things were being prepared, Anthony and I got the joy of hanging out with three-year-old Miles who has such a personality and lots of character. And what a sense of humor. He's the cutest. Just the kind of kid Anthony and I would want. And though there was an overcast and we opted out of getting in the pool, the "sunlight" came through in all the good people who were there that day. It felt like... HOME! Thank you, "... grace".

"The summer is here and the time is right for dancing in the streets"... or hanging out. We did some of our usual stops this week, which I want to shout out as suggested social fare for all of you who may come to New York City (as folks do during June, July, and August).

My Frankie, who I've known for about a decade now and is truly my 'first brother' in the National Association of Black Journalists, graciously invited me to accompany him to the Upper East Side of Manhattan's Gracie Mansion (www.nyc.gov/html/om/html/gracie.html). Mayor Bloomberg welcomed a huge, tented party of gays from New York City's poltical world onto his property to celebrate the coming of New York City PRIDE (www.nycpride.org/), the big LGBTQ festival that occurs throughout June (Borough to Borough) with parties, parades, and policies on the frontburner. In fact, the Mayor announced a program that the Human Resources Administration/Department of Social Services has adopted that will make HEALTH INSURANCE COVERAGE for DOMESTIC PARTNERS available (www.nyc.gov/healthstate). I'm sure there's more work to be done in regard to equal benefits and rights for gays, but this is a step in the right direction. Anthony and I may now put some more urgency in our desired move to Manhattan.

Meanwhile, my Morehouse brother and dear friend Mario and I got the chance to get some one-on-one time earlier this week. We did drinks at a spot in Chelsea called Room Service (www.roomservicerestaurant.com/). From there, we did "scallops and grits" at Anthony's friend Marcos' spot VOYAGE. Marcos hosts parties at VOYAGE which is in the West Village (www.myspace.com/voyagerestaurant). Now, THIRST: THE CLASSIC SOCIAL HOUR FOR BOYZ will take place every Wednesday (from 5 - 12 [HAPPY HOUR is 5 - 8]). Additionally, Marcos and he and Anthony's friend Robert (who had been doing a TUESDAY night set at Pier 2110 in Harlem [www.pier2110.com/]), but now say on TUESDAYS, they will be using our spot GINGER (www.gingerexpress.com/press.html) at which N HARLEM (http://www.nharlemnewyork.com/) does a FIRST WEDNESDAYS set. Last week, Anthony and I attended that set and had a great time with Natasha, who works at N HARLEM.  We enjoyed dancing with her and meeting her friend Q, who is a well-known stylist extraordinaire. One of his friends is a young Morehouse brother of mine. And as always, with N (Lenn, Larry, Nikoa, Jamar, and Natasha) and GINGER involved, ENERGY is great and off the charts.

But back to Mario's and my night. We decided to pop by SPLASH (www.splashbar.com/) which on Monday does a big party under the title of a good friend of mine Scott Nevins. (www.ScottNevins.com). Scott and I have auditioned to host a number of shows in New York City and when we've been "combo'd" together, we've found our chemistry to be off the charts. He's a very talented personality and performer and you can learn more about him via his www.myspace.com/ScottNevins . On this night, his 'CURTAIN CALL' featured Carly Jibson, Tracy in the Broadway production and National Tour of "Hairspray". After we looked at endless clips of Tony, Oscar, and Broadway performances - including "Dreamgirls" (on the TONY Awards 1982) and "Dreamgirls" (on the OSCARS 2007), Carly performed a handful of songs including her "Hairspray" gems; Irene Cara's "Flashdance (What a Feeling)"; Whitney Houston's "I Wanna Dance With Somebody (Who Loves Me)"; etc. Scott, then, came up to host a quick contest featuring a few people singing a capella songs from "Dreamgirls". One guy got up and did an excerpt from "And I Am Telling You I'm Not Going"; another did "One Night Only"; and one more Chelsea boy did Beyonce's "Listen". Mario looked at me and said "Rack [He calls me Rack as in PATARACK]? I need to hear some 'I Am Changing'". So, THIS JUST IN, I popped on the stage and surprised Scott with my presence and my announcement that I would lunge into an impromptu "I Am Changing". The response was great! And I won a signed, "Dreamgirls" poster. It was good to see Scott again. And he noted that he'd like us to do something together very soon as he's becoming steadily "the master of all media". So, I look forward to that.

From there, Mario and I stumbled into "Helen's" Cabaret and Piano Bar for one more drink before I was to get in my car service to go home (www.helensnyc.com/).  There, Mario negotiated another song for me to sing with the pianist. It was "My Funny Valentine" and it received a lovely response. (I enjoy singing, I guess you can tell....). We also ran into Flotilla DeBarge, renowned and adored drag queen, who is poised to perform "her" new show in Helen's Hideaway Room. It's called "Flotilla DeBarge: Live from Cellblock H" and it is running Thursday June 14 - Saturday June 16 --- all showtimes at 9:30 pm. It's a $15 cover and $15 food and/or beverage minimum. Go check "her" out, if you're around!!!

By the way, Ern and I got the chance to get our Hackensack, New Jersey Houston's on (www.hillstone.com) this past Saturday and we ran into Chris Rock's wife Malaak, who I had the chance to interview years ago about her Styleworks (www.styleworks.org/news.htm), a program that helps welfare-to-work women transition back into society with the proper attire and make-up. She and her daughters were enjoying a nice lunch.

Also, last night, Anthony and I were to join our South African girlfriend Melony and many of her friends and our mutual friends for 'opera' in Central Park's Great Lawn. It was to be "Boheme". But unlike Miss Ross, whose 1983 show on The Great Lawn  went on in the rain (for a little bit) before returning the next day to sunshine, "Boheme" was cancelled. Instead, my "Amazing Grace" Nichole, Anthony, Melony, and I enjoyed a lovely "Greek" meal of fried calf liver; shrimp dishes; hummus; wine and/or Veuve Clicquot (www.veuve-clicquot.com/) at Beyoglu (www.beyoglunyc.com). From there, we met some of Melony's friends (in town for PROMAX, big convention for PROMOTIONS producers and executives - www.promax.tv ). Ava Lounge was that spot. (www.avaloungenyc.com/) atop the oft-mentioned DREAM hotel, Anthony's and my favorite (www.dreamny.com/). From there, Melony's South African friend and former colleague Stephan, a creative director for United Senses (www.unitedsenses.tv) for drinks at STK, which is a hot, New York City spot in the meat-packing district (www.stkhouse.com). There, we ran into comedian George Lopez.

If these few days are the gauge, New York City and all within the radar of 'the life of Riley' are in for a treat! LET'S HAVE FUN!!!

I feel like I need to do a CLEARING with myself and VULNERABLY I am sharing with you.

As you all know, I am inside of a LOVING, PASSIONATE, and SEXY relationship with my Anthony. So often, by design, my BLOG "A Day in the Life of Riley" chronicles our happenings when we're out and about (looking good and smelling good). Typically, its design is NOT to tell play-by-play of my LIFE nor Anthony's and my COMPLETE LIFE: the behind-the-scenes of two men adjusting to living under one roof and adjusting to all the layers, nuances, and sensitivies that are par for the course when two people come together inside of a COMMITMENT.

With that, of course, we argue and debate sometimes. Typically, we come down from the heat of it and settle effortlessly. Inside of some of this, I'm learning the degree my not desirable WAYS OF BEING (around RIGHTEOUSNESS, SUPERIORITY, CONTROL, and EGO) can show up. ALSO, in the INTIMACY of a relationship, I can be DISMISSIVE, COLD, and TESTY... and on top of that, I can have a TEMPER and can go for the JUGULAR. I am not good at nit-picking. I don't like arguing. I don't like when people's complaints target me (even if it's constructive criticism). I prefer calm and pleasant exchanges. Yet knowing that is not always the reality, the stinging Scorpio in me will almost unconsciously go for something really hurtful to retort to anyone who comes in my way, if (in my mind or heart), I feel I am being provoked or critiqued too harshly. It's a horrible thing.

And after I've said it, not only am I remorseful, but I too -- in calmer retrospection -- realize the degree to which I said what I said as "a weapon" (not so much as "truth"). And I just want that understood and I want to move on - back into the joyful and effortless.

Well, it's not always that easy, especially since I've too had a knack for putting the relationship on the table - exclaiming that 'maybe it should be over, if we're arguing this heatedly and if it's that bad!!!!!!!'-kinda' sentiments  (HYPERBOLE and DRAMA on my part... but I say it because I know it hurts and can create the horrible feeling that I've just felt for whatever reason I - in that moment - am feeling abused or abandoned or misunderstood or mis-quoted. Again, these moments don't show up all the time, but they have... and should be addressed).

I want to - firstly - APOLOGIZE to ANTHONY for my sometimes inexcusable choices to go off on him, saying ugly and horrible things that are not consistent with how I feel about him at my core. (And to anyone else out there who has felt this wrath). And I too know that I've sometimes said these things in less appropriate places than where any civil person would want to argue about something personal i.e. the street. And that is also wrong on my part. And I APOLOGIZE for not using some discretion around when my frustration exacerbates to such a myopic, no-turning-back level.

I have told Anthony these things and it may take a minute for him to get over our most recent exchange, though he's agreed to move through it as quickly as he can. And I'll be PATIENT and have asked that he give me a chance to learn from my mistakes and LOVE HIM BETTER.

Additionally, he and I have approached this as an EMPOWERED RELATIONSHIP WITH A BREAKDOWN from which we can: ACKNOWLEDGE THE BREAKDOWN... LOOK AT WHAT'S WORKING AND NOT WORKING... then, RECOMMIT TO OUR GOAL, which is to MAINTAIN AND CONTINUE TO GROW A LOVING, JOYFUL, CONNECTING, PASSIONATE, AUTHENTIC, VULNERABLE, and SEXY RELATIONSHIP.

The EVIDENCE is ENDLESS where these POWEFUL and EFFECTIVE WAYS OF BEING are showing up. Additionally, we COMMIT to CONTINUE to be MINDFUL and AWARE when those WAYS OF BEING that don't align show up... and I share that here so you - my readers - know that I AM NOT PERFECT... I DON'T ALWAYS GET IT RIGHT... I AM WORKING ON MYSELF RIGHT ALONGSIDE CALLING JOY FORTH AND LIVING THIS 'LIFE OF RILEY' that is so much a part of fun, pop culture and POSSIBILITIES... and I offer to you (and - in tandem - offer to myself), the following lyric, which CONTEXTUALIZES something from which we can all LEARN and HEAL (I LOVE YOU, ANTHONY!):

We Must Be Kind

So many things I can't control
So many hurts that happen everyday
So many heartaches that pierce the soul
So much pain that won't ever go away

How do we make it better?
How do we make it through?
What can we do
When there's nothing we can do?

We can be kind
We can take care of each other
We can remember that deep down inside
We all need the same things

And maybe we'll find
If we are there for each other
That together we'll weather
Whatever tomorrow may bring

Nobody really wants to fight
Nobody really wants to go to war
If everyone wants to make things right
What are we always fighting for?

Does nobody want to see it?
Does nobody understand?
The power to heal
Is right here in our hand

We can be kind
We can take care of each other
We can remember that deep down inside
We all need the same things

And maybe we'll find
If we are there for each other
That together we'll weather
Whatever tomorrow may bring

And it's not enough to talk about it
Not enough to sing a song
We must walk the walk about it
You and I, do or die, we've got to try to get along

We can be kind
We can take care of each other
We can remember that deep down inside
We all need the same things

And maybe we'll find
If we are there for each other
That together we'll weather
Whatever tomorrow may bring

And maybe we'll find
True peace of mind
If we always remember
We can be kind